I’ve wanted to write a blog post for the past several weeks, but life around here has been very busy. Between family visiting for Ian’s birthday; a crazy scramble to finish my lactation educator class (review in the next blog post); and an out-of-state baby shower…there has been no time for writing.
Ian’s first birthday was fun, exciting, sad, and somewhat surreal. The past year went by so quickly, and it was hard to believe he was really turning 1! Our little infant turned into a toddler! I’m proud of the little boy he is turning into; excited for the phases to come; but sad that my little baby is growing up.
Beyond all of that, his birthday brought back all the memories of fear, grief, and lack of control surrounding his birth. All of the negativity pared with the joy of actually meeting him as a separate being made for an emotional turmoil a year ago and somewhat of one in reflection and memory. I had planned to go back and read my write up of his birth, but I still haven’t made myself do it. I’m sure doing so will be an emotional process, and I need the space to feel comfortable doing so.
Despite the emotional complexity, Ian’s birthday was a great day. Bennett took the day off so we could all spend it together. My mom was here as well. Since Ian’s actual birthday was a week day, my dad just flew in for his party.
The day was relaxing and peaceful. We played with Ian, watched him unwrap and play with a few presents, and relaxed mostly. My mom made sure it was part treat Ian day and part treat me and Bennett day by treating us to both a yummy lunch and dinner.
Bennett and I took Ian to play in the park playground for the first time. He loved going down the slide and checking out the playground equipment! It was really windy, so we couldn’t stay out too long, but he loved it!
We decided to have cupcakes on Ian’s actual birthday since he was getting a homemade birthday cake from Erinn for his party. Really it was an excuse for me to have cupcakes, but we decided to get him one to do with as he pleased… We got vegan since he still hasn’t really had eggs. We put the cupcake in front of him, expecting him to maybe play with it a little bit, but he grabbed it and started deconstructing it right away! Once he got some chocolate icing on his face and tasted it, he discovered his chocoholic gene ;) It was pretty funny! He was really not impressed with the cake part however.
His party that weekend was fun as well. We felt incredibly loved as Ian had several of his aunts and uncles as well as my parents and Bennett’s mom to celebrate with us. Ian, of course, got more presents then he can play with any time soon. I’m guessing that most little babies have that happen.
Erinn made an amazing cake for the party. He played with it, and ate a bit, but sadly for everyone’s watching entertainment, he was much more tentative with his cake escapades than he had been on his actual birthday. I think it was stage fright with so many people staring at him.
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